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at the top of the renaissance monument

visiting the monument with some friends

As you know this month is the beginning of some transitions for us.  One of them was starting french with the girls.  I thought that was going to be really fun, but really it’s a lot of work to help the girls and our language helper with teaching them french, it takes  a lot of activities and a lot of figuring out what is going to be good for them and a lot of “helping” them KEEP listening and participating.  It has been difficult, but I hope in the long run rewarding.  They are probably only gonna keep this up for a few weeks because Marie Claude will begin a new class soon with some new missionaries coming.  Maybe God will provide something to help them continue french after this.

After french class from 8-10 with the girls, we take a break and I homeschool Ava and figure out something to do with Penny… I love this part of the morning!!  I am loving teaching Ava school and I am grateful for the time with my girlies in the morning.  Our maid has started making meals on Mondays and Wednesdays instead of just Wednesdays because I just don’t have time anymore with doing school with the girls and studying myself.

After lunch (main meal here) I start my class.  This week is the first week with my new language helper.  I have been so nervous because this phase is different, there are a lot of activities and it is really different than before… I am sort of in charge of what activities we do and when.  I have felt the pressure of feeling the need to be prepared for my session and also the pressure and awkwardness with a new language helper that I don’t know at all.   And the thing with language sessions is that it’s fairly personal.  I am putting myself in a vulnerable spot because I feel pretty stupid talking…  because I’m trying so many new things, words, phrases and a lot of the time I sound like  baby learning to talk… but I’m an adult, and then there’s my language helper who has to answer a billion questions about all the new words and phrases and about her own life, it’s fairly intense.  So as I changed language helpers I was really nervous and quite stressed.  My language helper, she speaks really good french but she also speaks fast (she would tell you that too) and naturally she uses some different words than my previous helper, so there is just a lot to get used to.

Once a week we will go out and do something, this is called a “shared experience”  the next day I will record her explaining everything that happened during our “shared experience” and then we will play it back and I will ask my billion questions about new words phrases, maybe about some of the things we saw.  Well… Today was our first outing.  We went to a clothing store that I keep hearing about and is similar to an American store.  Patricia (my language helper) and I got a bus to the store, I loved it because there are not lots of people asking if I want at item or shoving things in my face trying to convince me that what they have is the best in the world and that I should buy 20 of them.  I could look around with NONE of that!!  I ended up buying something that was on sale, because that’s how I roll.  I loved that Patricia and I were beginning some life outside the class room, I love that she wanted to see what I looked like in the items I was interested in, and demanded to see!  After we finished there, she took me to a store across the street that she liked more, it was a little less expensive and she likes to go there… so I learned that!  We waited outside that store for the bus that we needed for about an hour or more and the bus never arrived, so I took a taxi home and she went the opposite direction.

It was actually really good that we ended up just standing there for so long.  For a little while we didn’t really talk, we just stood there, but then we began talking (all in french mind you) sometimes it’s hard to just start talking with someone you don’t know that well when it’s in a language you know let alone a language you don’t know.  But we began talking about random things around us, then about personal things, about my kids and happenings of the week.  It was really good to just talk!!

At the end of today I am grateful because I don’t feel so stressed and nervous about my new helper and new sessions.  Life is looking a little more up.  This morning after french and before lunch I was folding laundry and doing school with Ava, was texting with a friend letting her know that I was praying for their family and she responded with this “I have been praying for you guys that in 2016 Africa will become your home. And that as you build relationships in the community, the four of you will be knit together strongly to carry out God’s purpose for you there”  I needed to hear that.  I have felt so out of place this week as I find my place, and as I feel so far from home, I needed to be reminded that those important to me were praying for me and that God had us here and that eventually this will be very much a home.  I broke down crying and thanking God for what he has done and for people who pray for us.  I have come to such realization of the great need for prayer.

When I got home from my adventure today I got an email from someone in the New Tribes Training… She told me that my newsletter was the best written news letter she had ever received (first of all that blessed me!)  She explained how awesome it was that we were real with how we were doing and how everyone who reads what we write can pray for us.  Yes she complimented me, but also she got the newsletter in North Cotes because she is a part of Hold the Ropes… people who come together to pray for missionaries.  I have been on that side of Hold the Ropes and yes I took it seriously but I take it much more seriously now and I hope that if I am on that side of things again, and even now that I will pray for missionaries that I know.  We as believers need to come together and pray for one another against the principalities and powers of darkness.  We need to come together with the Holy Spirit and fight these battles.  At the end of today I am encouraged with the way God has encouraged me.  We are on this journey and some days are not easy.  Transitions are never easy, but they are good as they shape and build character.  God is good to be faithful and provide, he doesn’t swoop in and make life easy and perfect, but he provides, he provides encouragement, relationship and depth and for that I am grateful.

I love making food and I love my family, put two together and that makes a totally awesome time!!

Donuts and Penny love one another

these absolutely turned out wonderful!!

fun and yummy foods for New Years Eve

The result: good

This is when Anna was with us and not far far away… :'(

It is 2016, and just a couple of weeks ago it was 2015.  Like most people this causes me to look back on the year and think back on all that has happened in our lives.

A LOT has happened.  God has brought us on quite the journey, a lot of the time the journey feels hard, but I can also account for much joy even within the trials.  He is so good,  He has not failed to lead us.  Today my heart feels a lot of joy for many reasons at the same time as it feels a lot of different kinds of pains.

God brought me down a journey of health and a renewed way of following him, we went deeper into relationship and faith with God, we trusted in new ways, in big ways.  We felt hurt by God more than ever before, and he was still faithful to never leave us, even when we were angry with him.  He blessed us through our wonderful church in Florida and friends to love and care for us, and ministered to us big time.  He provided for us full support to head to Africa.  He has met us with daily needs, and relationship needs.  He allowed Del and Arielle to be here with us for the first several months of us living here in Senegal.  He has met us in a big way spiritually as we seeked him considering his promises to us.  We have gone EVEN deeper into relationship with God as we seek him and as he reveals himself to us.  You know it’s interesting as we look back we can see that we wouldn’t have known him this well if it wasn’t for the difficult things.  This year has been really hard and really good at the same time!

We are excited to be here in Africa, we are exploring this place and building relationships,  we are making mistakes and learning from them, we are being stretched and continuously burdened for the gospel.  This next year is fairly unknown for us.  We have no idea where  we will be moving in the next couple months (or sooner), we don’t know who our host family will be or what church we will be a part of.  But in time, (hopefully soon) we will know, and the story will unfold.  I look forward to seeing how God answers prayers and how He will grow us.  Right now, the things that are most hard is missing family and friends.  My heart literally hurts to be away from all those important to me.  Relationships is my deal and I hate being away from loved ones.  I just want to bring you all here with me, I want the best of both worlds!  I wonder what Heaven will be like?  Will I get to go shopping and go out to breakfast or coffee?  Wonder around Target (Krista!) together.  Will we get to have a family Christmas? Is there “family” time?  I have no idea, but I hope it’s awesome!  When I think about missing home, yes there is food I want, but it’s the people I miss most, my heart hurts when I think about that!

That’s all for now, more to come soon.

Love this man

They love them, and wear them often!

We had dresses made for Ava and Penny for Christmas… so fun!

This holiday season I am counting my blessings. This has been a special time for us. For thanksgiving we got to spend a surprisingly really special evening with some fellow missionaries at our Mission. We contributed a couple homemade dishes, corn bread stuffing, and sweet potato casserole. I invited a friend I made at the women’s retreat a couple of weeks ago, from Switzerland… so fun!

It can be a little tricky bringing several hot dishes and kids across town by taxi in busy traffic, but I can now tell you that it CAN be done! The Saturday after thanksgiving we celebrated with my brother’s family. I had been cooking all week in preparation. Everything was complicated, but it was sort of a dream come true and excuse to make every single dish from scratch. I made my own broth, which turned into cream of mushroom soup for the green bean casserole, and went into the stuffing. I made my own corn bread and toasted it into crumbs, bought bread from the bakery, made crumbs out of that, I bought celery for $8 from a local grocery store (usually we get fresh stuff from the Market (outdoors from local people, kind of like a big farmer’s market).

$8 Celery (Necessary for stuffing of course)

I fried my own onions for the green bean casserole.

We used pumpkin from the US for our pumpkin pie, I used Leah Cherry’s amazing pie crust suggestions and it turned out so flakey and delicious! I made an apple pie from the Pioneer Woman’s cook book.

I made my own creamed corn for the corn pudding and, we used the hibiscus flowers her to make “cranberry sauce”, and I made my own cardamom rolls which reminded me of Mormor.

Last but not least, I made 2 citrus herb buttered chickens… I didn’t really mind not having turkey, I like chicken better anyway. Oh how wonderful and fulfilling to make so many things and have them turn out so yummy! Anna made a buttermilk pie, cheesy mashed potatoes and a creamy pretzel strawberry jello.

Arielle and Del brought there own side dishes and desserts… we had a feast and spent the whole day resting and enjoying each other. I feel confident that our thanksgiving food was better than most of yours…. LOL JK!

We made a thanksgiving tree this year which I think will be our new tradition. We made leaves for it and daily put more leaves on it with things that we are thankful for, it was fun and good for our souls.

There are a 1,000 things I am thankful for, but it caused me to stop and think what I am truly thankful for right now!! I am so thankful that God communicates and for how he is communicating, I am thankful that I am turning a corner in my relationship with God and seeing him again for who he is, and how he sees me. I am SOoooo thankful for my two girls and their individual personalities, I’m thankful for Penny’s spice and cuddles and Ava’s BIG heart and care for others wellbeing and whether or not they know Jesus.

Penny actually let Ava brush her hair… these girls were being sweet together.

I am thankful for family in Africa and the blessing they the been to us. I am thankful for Anna being here, we are gonna miss her so much! I am thankful for “M” (our house) help and for the answer to prayer that she has been. I am also thankful for a new friend in “M”, and for friendship in our language helper Marie Claude, I am beginning to feel blessed with friends. I am thankful that even though expensive there is cheese in Africa, cream, butter, and (even more expensive) 1 good coffee roaster in the city. I am thankful that God has exceeded our expectations with our support level both financially and spiritually. He is so good! We are so thankful for everyone who is behind us!

We have just started French phase 2B which mean we are beginning to study and listen to stories in past tense, our brains are continually getting stretched, but it is encouraging to know that we are progressing. We have been here for 3 months, and the other day was my first phone conversation in French. I even dream in French, usually it’s the same word and it’s a frustrating dream but it is french :).

Like I said I am really grateful for our maid. I feel like God desire’s her heart, and I can see all over the place that he loves her and is pursuing her. She and her spice fits our family really well… of course both those things would fit well in our family :).  What I love about her is that she will sit and eat with us and sometimes struggle through french conversation for sometimes hours at a time, she doesn’t rush out when she’s done with her work. My desire is to show her Love, and build a relationship with her, which is definitely happening. I want her to know that when she’s in our home, she’s a part of our family.  We are hoping as time goes on, and within all of our own human mistakes that God would give us the grace to show  his love and compassion, so that those around us will want to know the God who gave his life for us.

some pretty baskets I found

Last week was sort of a momentous day. Arielle, Annalise, Anna and I were all going to be going to the fabric market, and I invited “M” to come with us, not to work but to just hang out with us, she asked me why? I said “because I like you” she smiled and to my surprise she said yes! I instantly felt nervous, like what had I done? Was this going to be weird? We wouldn’t all fit in a taxi, what were we going to do? It turned out to be a really fun time, and LOVED getting to spend time with her as just a friend rather than just her boss. She took us on car rapids (Rap-eeds) there, and as we looked for fabric, she helped and left stores when she didn’t want to stay anymore dragging us with her, she was cracking us up the whole time!! It was really fun though and wouldn’t have been the same with out her. Arielle, Annalise and Anna were all saying how fun she was! I came home with a happy heart and grateful I had stepped out on a little limb in asking her to come with us.

We have been here for 3 months now, and the reality is starting to sink in that this is our new home. I still struggle (not physically, but mentally) with not eating gluten free/grain free, and very limited refined sugar. This is a hard area for me because I LOVE cooking with healthy ingredients, and even though I can get a lot of stuff here, there is a lot that I can’t get. I catch myself thinking “when we get back to the states I’m gonna make this, this and this!” When the reality is that this stuff we have here, this is what we get and this is what I can learn to cook with. So I do recognize that it won’t be so hard forever, it will get easier/normal to eat the way we eat here, and I look forward to when I stop thinking about the ingredients I WANT to use. Right now it has to be a conscious choice to choose joy, and I’m hoping that in time I won’t have to choose joy so often it will come a little more naturally… lol, that sounds funny, I hope you know what I mean.

I made potstickers this week… they took hours to make, but turned out really yummy!!

I was so grateful we brought our Christmas box with us, it makes it feel like home!

Written on Saturday November 14th:

I got the opportunity to come to a women’s retreat with at least 100 women, most of whom live in Senegal.
Since losing our last baby my world has been rocked and I haven’t known how to move forward with trusting God. And yet, especially in the last month, I can sense Him calling me back to Himself, with a continuous sense to be rid of the lies my heart wants to believe.  Being near to God is like being near no one else; it is deep, intimate, and life changing.  Being near God is being in a place where we grow, where we grow to love Him, serve Him and Just BE His.

We arrived at our 5 Star hotel yesterday and had our first session last night.  I didn’t plan on really hearing from God here because I have felt in the past that there is the stereotype that these are the kinds of places where we hear from God-when in reality we can hear from God anywhere.  That is true, BUT how ignorant am I that I don’t believe He can use these seasoned and amazing women to bless me and speak into my life! After the first session today there was a healing prayer meeting at 11:30.  I didn’t want to go because I didn’t needed prayer, or healing, for that matter.  On the outside I want everyone to think I’m good and I wasn’t interested in being vulnerable…  Again!  Why would I want to be vulnerable again?  I didn’t want to be vulnerable with other women let alone be vulnerable with God… He hurt me!  That is how I felt.  I was just CURIOUS… didn’t want to be prayed for… HA!  Turns out that us 20 women split up into like 5 groups.  There were 4 people in our group and no longer could I sit on the outskirts and just listen to what people wanted prayer for, but I was in an inner circle where they were gonna ask me what I wanted prayer for. What did I want HEALING for (?) that is an even bigger question!

The lady that was leading our small prayer group I could tell had experienced a lot past doubt in praying for healing. As she has come along in her journey, she has learned to expect God to come, expect Him to speak, expect Him to heal.  Not in a weird way, because the ladies leading this also talked about how God works and heals the way He wants to heal.  Healing isn’t just something He does, it is something He is (I LOVE this!!).  Sometimes He doesn’t heal right now.  Now… they were talking about spiritual, physical and emotional healing.  They were clear that God is not our puppet and he doesn’t heal everyone right there, and we don’t know why.  All we know is that we can come to Him, expecting Him to be able, expecting Him to do something in our hearts, in our minds, and maybe in our bodies.  But we are open to Him and we are inviting Him…. okay that is my premise for what’s next.

As the two ladies before me shared and cried as they shared what they needed healing for, I started shaking a little knowing that it was gonna be my turn to share next.  And remember, I wasn’t ready for this, but God obviously had me there for a reason and I could tell that He was working and He was preparing my heart.  It was like He was calling me to His side, asking me to consider hearing from Him.

So I shared very quickly that I had lost 5 babies in the last 2 years and that this past year God has brought me through a journey of physical healing and that I got pregnant with what I thought was a blessing from God, and to my great surprise I lost the “promised” baby.

So as each lady shared, our prayer leader (warrior) was praying/listening to God and pictures would come to her mind and she would just share them with us. She had no knowledge of our past or what God had already done, or how he had worked.  She reminds of my mom of the way she listens to God and sees pictures that God gives her.  So…  when I shared what I shared, she said she thought of Rachel in the Bible and also that she felt like God was doing a big work in my husband (I have seen that) and that God was inviting me to remember His promise and that He hasn’t forgotten me, that she felt like He was asking me to hope again in the promise He had given me, to remember the name that He had given me.

I loved how she continuously shared scripture that was brought to mind, and had us as individuals repeat scripture as it applied to us.  She wanted to remind us that she is very careful with what she tells people and that she is vulnerable when she shares what pops into her mind (what God gives her) because the tendency is to be quiet especially -when it comes to someone’s womb, but if God is speaking then we must share. She reminded us to compare all that she says with God’s word, and that He is the authority in all things.  Okay so even though I’m trying to share details with you, I want to share with you what I walked away with in my heart.  We can be as skeptical as we want with what people say, but when it is confirmed in scripture and other people then we must consider what God is saying.

I know that God is calling for me, and I haven’t known how to come.  This morning one of the songs talked about believing Him again…  like I’ve stopped.  Yes, I have stopped believing Him, and He wants me back.  What I’m getting from this retreat so far is that He wants me, He finds worth in me, that is why He pulls me to Him. He decided that I was worth Jesus, He gave up Jesus for me, that I might have life in Him.  And today, as I was listening to that song about believing Jesus again, I struggled with knowing how to do that.  And yet I have not stopped seeking Him because, even though it is difficult in my heart, I know in my head that He is worth it!

So these ladies, these seasoned missionaries that I was sitting around with in prayer, were struggling too! And it was a REALLY special time of prayer and hearing from God.  I felt incredibly blessed!  What did I walk away from that with?  I walked away with a new sense of hope in the Lord, like He hadn’t left me, that He wasn’t going to leave me, and not only that, but that He hadn’t forgotten me.  One of the things that our leader of our group of 4 felt lead to tell me  was that whatever happened, it wasn’t my fault and I hadn’t done anything wrong.
Side Note:  I thought I must have heard from God wrong, I really did.  Someone may have told me before that it wasn’t my fault, but I didn’t hear it until today.  And the other thing I walked away with today in my heart is that HE didn’t forget what He spoke to me way back in the spring… I didn’t hear Him wrong.  It just hasn’t played out the way I pictured it would.  With complete vulnerability and trust in the Lord I walk forward with the Lord believing Him for the promise He gave me.  You may think I’m crazy or tell me that’s a bad idea, but what if I know it in my heart?  I believe God has more children for me, I believe God has a baby boy for me. I don’t know if that baby will come from my womb, I don’t know if that baby will be adopted or if it will be an African baby.  But I believe God for what He has said.  What was the name He gave me?  Joseph, it was Joseph.  So Joseph I will pray for, I will pray for him daily whoever he is.  Can I also tell you a little secret?  Maybe about a month ago, Ava came to me and said “mommy I’m praying for God to give us a baby boy”  She said “I’m praying and I’m gonna pray every day for a baby boy for you”.  I have literally just brushed her off because I feel like that is ridiculous, I have felt like that is a stupid thing to pray because obviously God has already said no.  My sweet girl, she LOVES God… and I don’t doubt that she hears from Him at 5 years old.

As I continue to walk forward I am trusting God in a new way.  Today I have a renewed relationship with the Lord.  A sort of – jump forward with not holding back-sort of renewing.  I am thankful for Him continuing to pursue me when I believe the worst of Him.  You may think I’m crazy to jump back toward the Lord like this.  But let me make something clear… I’m not gonna pretend like I know how God is gonna work or make some big plan to make things happen. I’m gonna seek God, and I’m gonna listen to Him, because let me tell you He speaks clearly… He  really does.  God has been faithful and He remains the same… He will never change!  Don’t you love that?!  Why…. Why am I sharing these such personal things with you?  Because I want you to know that God is faithful in my life, I want you to know that I am far from perfect, but I want to stay close to Jesus because He is and He will guide me.  I received a really encouraging email from an elderly couple, and she said to me “Every day God is preparing you for tomorrow”.  We are to love God for today, serve Him today, listen to Him today to see what He says and how He leads.  Today is just today, don’t worry about tomorrow.  God knows tomorrow not me, isn’t that comforting?  Thank you Jesus, I want to make a public proclamation that God has moved in my heart and continues to lead me day by day, and I don’t believe that He will stop. {Sigh}  These things are good.  If you are one of my prayer warriors, please pray with me, to serve God today, to trust Him and listen to Him today, because that is where He is with us, He is in today.  Thank you.

God gave TJ these scriptures the morning after I got home and sure enough God has been doing a big work in him, and I am encouraged by these as well.

My new skirt that I got at the retreat. The lady selling it lowered the price and someone helped me buy it… I love it!! (Also trying the head wrap thing out more often)

Eating crazy weird and delicious foods at the buffet in our dining hall

this is me writing.

Walking away from Saly about to get a taxi back to our hotel… yes I’ve been bartering for taxi’s on my own… yaay for progress that I thought I would never make.

We ventured into Saly together to find some lunch together… some pretty fun adventures with these special girls.

“M” did my head wrap for me… trying to be more African

Today we visited another church, this has been my favorite church so far!  I love how it was set up, the room was not huge, but very open, there were benches with plenty of space in-between them (for our kids to move their legs a little), and our family (& Anna, but she’s family) got our own bench (rather than smashed with no room and kids on our laps).  I loved how the pastor preached even though I didn’t really know what he was saying (lol), I loved how welcoming the people were, everyone walked passed us shaking our hands and asking us how we were. The music was amazing!  They had a piano, a drum set and like a 7 djembe set up, and they rocked the house.  Even though I wasn’t able to sing the words my heart was able to worship God.. Halleluiah! I closed my eyes and listened to the music and felt the beat of the music in my bones, and just shared my heart with God, it was refreshing for my soul!  I was grateful today that we could come together with other believers even though it’s difficult to talk to one another, and even though it was hard to understand the sermon, we were “with” them, and more than usual I could sense God’s presence there and his Holy Spirit working. I didn’t need to know the language to sense that God was there ministering to me, and most likely others in the room.  Ava and Penny went to the Sunday school class after about 7-10 songs (yes I love that the music is so long)… they don’t care about the time here, they are not concerned with how long things go, they are there to worship God together.  No one is looking at their watches, I don’t think I’ve seen a clock in a church here yet.  It is difficult for us as Americans to sit all the way through a service, but I love what is behind that, and the value that is put in being together to worship the Lord.  Back to Ava and Penny, they went to a Sunday School, our friend Leah also went in with them.  Ava made a friend, and after the service they were attached at the hip.  Ava ran up to me and said “Mommy!!!  I made my first African friend!”  My eyes got a little wet, because this was big for her, big for me.  When we were standing around outside the church I snatched a little 2 month old Senegalese baby boy… I have been wanting to hold an African baby since I got here, what a sweet moment for me today, I wanted to keep him, I didn’t meet the mother, but I’m pretty sure she would not be happy with me, wish I got a picture of that baby, seriously adorable!

Ava and her new friend

Our first few months here are rather low key as far as churches and African relationships go, and more focused on intense French study, that is where most of our time goes.  In January we will be assigned a church and a host family that goes to that church, and we will move closer to our host family.  These first few months I know are good because it is necessary that we get lots of french time in but it’s hard for me to because there are not many relationships being developed.  As we attend different churches to see what different churches are like I struggle, because I long to begin developing relationships, and if you know me then you know that’s what I love about life, building deep life long relationships!  It breaks me heart a little that Ava made this friend at this church because that will not be our permanent church here in Senegal (however we may attend there a few more times before this year is over :).  We have been praying for our host family, that they will be a good fit for us, and that God will be preparing that relationship.  We have also been praying that God would provide the right apartment for us, and that we would LOVE it… is that a fair prayer?  I think so.

Wax print Family 🙂 TJ is gonna have to get used to this whole “matching business”

There are plenty of physical struggles here, with all that comes with daily life, cooking, cleaning, cooking and cleaning some more, gathering vegetables from Market, grocery shopping and carrying groceries home, taking an hour or 2 to put our girls to bed, and so much more.  Most days these things are just feeling normal, and the fact that we feel tired quite often because of the work that life is along with language learning and it being very warm, it is just normal.  But sometimes All of this new normal feels a little more difficult because of our lack of relationships here… does that makes sense?  TJ mainly just has a sense of adventure and so he goes out and does “stuff” he goes out and talks to all sorts of people, he drinks stranger’s coffee and shares the gospel with random people who speak a decent amount of english… this fulfills him.  What do I normally do to fulfill my inner Lily?  (I’m speaking more of just who I am, not so much spiritual fulfillment) I spend time with friends, like specific friends.  And in Florida there was a few specific people or families I/we would just spend time with, on a regular basis (quality time/words of affirmation = my love language).  It has been over 2 months since we were “home”  and it’s feeling past due to spend time with these people.  So not only do I miss the people that I normally get to spend “quality time” with, but I’m not building any new relationships.  This is trying for me in a new way, and it is also growing anticipation in me as we look forward to the next step here.

This past week we started phase 2 of our french study.  Our class of 5 split up into 2 groups, TJ and I are with the same language helper that we had before and it is going really well.  Some days I feel like I’m actually learning this language, and other days I feel discouraged, like I’m never gonna learn french.  Our language helper is from Ivory Coast and she speaks impeccable french which is fun!  And you ask… what exactly do we do in French class?  Well right now, we look at wordless stories and TJ and I take turns explaining everything in the picture, and our Language Helper helps us with the new words, writes them down in our word log and when we’re done with a session we record her saying the new words and retelling the story, so that later we can listen and point to them (with the picture that we took).  So then later we listen listen listen to the stories, and new words, and then through the story we reuse words and re-listen to the same words, it’s a pretty awesome program.  There is no study and memorize, it’s basically just a listen until your brain gets it and then it’s in your brain, and when it needs to use it, it will… pretty cool!!

Remember how I said words of affirmation is one of my needs?  And the fact that we don’t have many Africa friends here? Which means there isn’t many people to encourage me in my french, I can’t remember the last time someone of importance (an African) said “hey your doing a good job!”  I’m not trying to stand on my soap box, just wanted to give a picture of what is difficult for me and what I am looking forward to as time progresses.  I am aware that this is a stage, and that there will be another stage in life.  And so I also want to state what I appreciate about these few months that are less busy (I don’t feel like they are less busy, but apparently we will be more busy in a couple months).  I also appreciate the fact that we don’t know many people yet, because it gives us time as a family to adjust to just be here and develop who we are as a family in this country.  Struggling a little on our own, finding a bit of our own footing.  It is actually nice to not have a church yet because as we have entered a new country it is nice to not have any church responsibilities, and it’s nice not having a host family checking up with us all the time.  We get to be sort of free for a couple months, and I like that, I like that we have been given a little freedom in that.  It also builds anticipation for what’s ahead as well and gives us time to pray for our church, for our relationships and for our host family.  So there are difficulties and there are also benefits.

Also… if I ever just want to feel encouraged or a boost of moral I can just dress up my family in matching outfits and walk the streets.  Everyone will wave us down and say (Think Accent) “Woaw, Senegal-ay… Tres Jolie!” with a smile and a wave.  This was us last Friday as we all went out in our new matching African outfits. First I thought it was just the people that see us on a daily basis and that they were glad that we were finally wearing African clothes, but then we started walking in a part of town that rarely sees us and they continued to compliment us, celebrating the white people wearing African clothes… plus our girls looked adorable ;).  Like I said, if I ever need a little encouragement, I’ll just dress us up and we’ll go for a walk.

Penny & Ava… too adorable! I can’t take it 🙂

As TJ and I settle down a little more here, we see God, we see him providing, we see him standing with us, behind us, loving us.  We are beginning the process of trusting him again, and as we live daily lives we can see how intimately he cares for us and is so IN THIS!  Do you know what I mean?  He is answering prayers, he is showing himself to us.  He’s revealing himself through Anna our Nanny/teacher, through our maid (who isn’t a believer), through Ava, who has such a big heart… also a strong will, but a BIG heart for the lost!  He’s revealing himself through circumstances, through, other missionaries, through my brother’s family.  Whether we see it or not, God is all around us!

We took Anna to see a school here, it was weird like walking back into American culture for an afternoon, it was a bit of a shock to my system. We wore our African clothes, but then felt our of place at the American school.

We have loved having Anna live with us, she is definitely a part of our family now and there is gonna be a hole when she’s gone. The girls are getting along well with her now (with the normal amount of disobedience) We are so grateful to get to know her, and have her here with us.  We love you Anna!!

We have been praying for a long time, at least a year maybe two that God would provide someone to watch our girls after Anna leaves in January.  TJ and I will still be doing personal language sessions and will need someone to help with our kids.  I didn’t know how it was going to work out and I even tried coordinate my own plans before I could see what God was doing.   We as a family get along with “M” well, and she has really opened up with us.  When we sit down for a meal we struggle through french together, and even though it is super frustrating because our knowledge is limited (but continually growing) we get to talk to each other (this is good for my “needy friend” needs ;).  Usually lunch (the big meal) “M” and I work on the kitchen together and we continue to struggle through conversation together, she is my only African friend at the moment and I’m holding on to that tightly :).

Thanks for following, thanks for praying.  If I know you well you know I love you! 🙂

Silas turned 4 and we got to celebrate with him.

Silas and all his friends

Fun Party, Del and Ari did a perfect job. I bartered for my first tax on Saturday morning to get to Del and Ari’s early to help… unfortunately I left my sunglasses in the taxi. 🙁

I love that these kiddos get to be together!!

Sight Seeing with Del and Ari Fam

Love being together

Grateful for this women, and thankful I get to spend a great deal of time with her in this short season of life until they move.

love this man.

be still my heart!

My friend Martha put brought flowers and visited Nola’s grave for me.

{Sigh} Life, I love to live until death happens at which point I want to evade life.  Last week was hard.  I didn’t want to be here in Senegal, I didn’t feel like cooking, mothering, being a wife, didn’t feel like going outside, and was depressed inside… I wanted to be home (so funny… where is that even?) but I have this feeling that even if I was in Florida, California or Missouri for that  matter that I wouldn’t want to be there either.  Evading Nola’s death was impossible and remains that way.  Her birthday, October 22nd is just another reminder that she is not here, and that all the babies that came after her are not here either.

This last loss was a tough blow, to us as parents, to our trust in God, and to our desire to have more children.  Because we came here to Senegal directly after loosing a child, we didn’t get a chance to really deal with it for a while, and it takes a while to deal with these things anyway.  I feel 100% confident that it was time to go and that it was time to be here, and I still feel that way.  But right now, just about the time of Nola’s Birthday, life has started to settle down, and my heart is just starting to grasp what happened, my heart is beginning to deal with some of the heart ache and beginning to ask God questions about the future.  My heart is asking, what does it look like to trust God again?  Lord how do we move forward together?

A year ago.

All week I wore my Nola Grace necklace, and the girls talked about her every day.  Penny would grab my necklace and say “this reminds me of Nola”.  We talked about how old she would be, how life would be different with her in our lives.  I love that the girls miss her too… it’s not just my pain, it’s their’s too.  Ava often asks me if I’m pregnant, “when are you going to be pregnant again?” and then she tells me how sad she is about all the babies that we lost, and starts to think of names for all of them… sweet girl, when I lost the baby after Nola, she named that one Star, and it stuck… no names for the others, I think I’ll let God do the naming for those.

new flowers and bucket from flowers last year.

By Thursday the 22nd I came out of my depression and really had a blessed day as we spent it with each other and my brother Del, Arielle and their family.  I was reminded of God’s grace and all that he did through Nola.  I think my recent experiences have faded my picture of what God did through Nola, but I can’t forget that God met me in those dark places with such grace and peace, and strength where strength shouldn’t have been.  I can’t forget how he revealed himself to TJ and I, I can’t forget how he used her to affect people, he got to people’s hearts through our story, and Jesus was able to impact people’s hearts through Nola’s death.  God was glorified through Nola’s life.  It doesn’t change the fact that I miss her… Oh do I miss her!  And I still feel pangs of the deep pain I felt in my heart as the day we said goodbye to our little girl.

Spending the day with the fam.

I felt encouraged by this Psalm today.

Psalm  27:3-5

“Though an army encamp against me,

my heart shall not fear;  though war arise against me, yet I will be confident.  One thing I have asked of the LORD, that will I seek after;  that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD and to inquire in his temple.  For he will hide me in his shelter in the day of trouble;  he will conceal me under the cover of his tent;  he will lift me high upon a rock.

So, here we are 5 babies lost later and the reality of right now is that I don’t get it and I don’t understand, but I’m trusting God.  I have been challenged recently with the fact that I might not feel like God is all the things he says he is, but that doesn’t change who he is.  I have experienced this past week deep struggle, and God met me there too, He used friends, mentors and sisters in Christ to encourage me, to point me to Christ, encouraging me to share my burdens, to not be afraid to share my struggles.  I am encouraged by those praying and those standing with us.  God has not left me alone, that is the truth.  Speaking of sharing burdens, I had a moment with our maid today.  I can tell she feels really comfortable with us now which makes my heart happy.  Today I could tell that she was down, she told me that her cousin died last Friday, and that she wouldn’t be able to come to work on Wednesday.  And so I started asking her more questions like,  were they close? Yes.  How old was he? 26.  It was sudden and totally unexpected…  So sad!  I asked her if I could hug her (not so normal to do here)  and she gratefully accepted a hug, and we cried together for a minute as we embraced.  Why is it that we as humans do well to share burdens?  I was glad she told me, and shared more than she had to with me, and my heart hurt with hers as she grieves the loss of her friend and cousin.

God does not want us to be alone, he does not want us to struggle on our own… and I wonder does he struggle at all?  What does he think when I’m over here freaking out?  Does his heart hurt like mine?  And you know what else?  I know Jesus prays, he intercedes for us, what is he praying right now?  I would love to know that!  I even feel like God is giving me little gifts here and reminding me of his character and love for me through material things.  He knows my love for food and my love for cooking… and coffee!  We found a coffee roaster here in Dakar that roasts coffee from all over.  It is about $12.00 a lb so it’s a little bit expensive, but wow what a yummy treat!  I have been really thankful for the fruit stand across the street where I feel totally comfortable now with buying fruit there.  We eat amazing apples daily, and sometimes super sweet bananas, clementines, papaya and more.  We can get bread easily from the bakery across the street as well.  I am thankful for Martine who cooks for us amazing food once a week!!  All fruits and veggies might take a little more work to get (from market and such) and clean, but we have it, we get to eat fresh food… mmmm!  God is good to bless us with these things.

trying the coffee… mmmmm

The little things: We found a coffee roaster

And my 2 girls… Ava and Penny, I love them to pieces… I m feeling extra grateful and thankful for them these days.  I know that I shared that I have struggled with being down, but on the flip side I have felt much more even keeled with the girls, not getting so easily flustered and agitated.  We have felt more focused in discipline and not all over the place.  I feel like we are getting in a groove in life, that doesn’t mean we don’t have difficult days, but within the difficult days we have vision and focus for what we’re doing and why, and the girls see that too.  I am thanking God for giving me patience and a special love for me girls during hard days.  They are feeling more at home here, Ava even said to me tonight “Mommy what if I marry a brown Senegal boy, would that be silly?”  And then she followed that by asking God to help her marry a boy who knows God well… again, I love her heart!

One of my good friends sent this to me on a day God knew I needed it.  I cried through it as I needed to hear these truths, and I needed to be refocused! I hope it blesses you too.  Thanks Krista!

“‘The love of Christ constraineth us.’

2 Corinthians 5:14

How much owest thou unto my Lord? Has he ever done anything for thee? Has he forgiven thy sins? Has he covered thee with a robe of righteousness? Has he set thy feet upon a rock? Has he established thy goings? Has he prepared heaven for thee? Has he prepared thee for heaven? Has he written thy name in his book of life? Has he given thee countless blessings? Has he laid up for thee a store of mercies, which eye hath not seen nor ear heard? Then do something for Jesus worthy of his love. Give not a mere wordy offering to a dying Redeemer. How will you feel when your Master comes, if you have to confess that you did nothing for him, but kept your love shut up, like a stagnant pool, neither flowing forth to his poor or to his work. Out on such love as that! What do men think of a love which never shows itself in action? Why, they say, ‘Open rebuke is better than secret love.’ Who will accept a love so weak that it does not actuate you to a single deed of self-denial, of generosity, of heroism, or zeal! Think how he has loved you, and given himself for you! Do you know the power of that love? Then let it be like a rushing mighty wind to your soul to sweep out the clouds of your worldliness, and clear away the mists of sin. ‘For Christ’s sake’ be this the tongue of fire that shall sit upon you: ‘for Christ’s sake’ be this the divine rapture, the heavenly afflatus to bear you aloft from earth, the divine spirit that shall make you bold as lions and swift as eagles in your Lord’s service. Love should give wings to the feet of service, and strength to the arms of labour. Fixed on God with a constancy that is not to be shaken, resolute to honour him with a determination that is not to be turned aside, and pressing on with an ardour never to be wearied, let us manifest the constraints of love to Jesus. May the divine lodestone draw us heavenward towards itself.” – Charles Spurgeon

Last Weekend at the Beach

the girls looking at a monkey

We went to the beach last weekend with Del and Arielle family, and there African friends

I’m catching myself a little on the emotional side this morning… but a few things are hitting me and I want to write about them.  You always catch the emotional side of me, because that’s when I write… when I can feel.

Today is Sunday morning, and I feel fine and I’m not going to church (whooooops… shhhhh! 😉  I only say that, because we’re supposed to be visiting churches here in Senegal.  We listened to a Sermon by our pastor this morning, and if felt SOOO Soooo soooo good to be fed!  Ava and Penny were playing on the floor and Ava looked up and said “hey, is this our pastor talking?”  we said “yes” and her face lit up with the feeling of familiarity like we were listening to a bit of home… and we were!  During the sermon he talked about toiling for the gospel, and not doing it half heartedly, be one of the quality utensils in the drawer.  He had different leaders in the church stand up, people who serve in children’s ministry, small group leaders, elders, and TJ mentally stood up in our living room as we listened because we are the Church missionaries, and this is where God has us.  We felt encouraged to press on, to do what God has called us to do well.  I felt encouraged to parent with integrity, to study french with audacity, to have a good attitude as we feel normalcy stripped from us to find a new “us” or better yet find out how Christ “in us” is the most important.

This Girl

I am also challenged by my passionate daughter Ava.  She fights me like you wouldn’t believe, but as I continue to watch her I can see that she’s gonna fight for what she believes in with the same sort of tenacity.  A couple weeks ago I came into the living room to Ava going through her children’s chronological Bible book with our friend.  Ava ran up to me and said “I want “____” to know God, so I’m telling her”  My heart felt full and thankful for her sweet and individual passion for God.  I had to explain to her that we don’t know french well enough to tell her about God, but we can pray for her right now until we do know French well enough.  And she said “well… how many words do you know?  which ones do you know?”  She didn’t want to take no for an answer, she wanted to find a way for our friend to know God!  Just a few days after that we had a couple from our french class over for lunch, and the next day he said that our daughter really impacted him.  He said while they were in the living room talking with TJ, Ava came up to TJ and said “do they know God?  or do we need to tell them?”  He said that her heart really blessed him.  Well she blesses me too, It’s like God put the burden for the lost on her heart too, and we’re not just here in Africa to do our ministry.  It’s a reminder that Ava and Penny are just as much a part of this as we are, our little teammates… our little missionaries.

language learning

A little more about normal life for us:  Every morning we have french class at 8:30.  We live on the 3rd floor of our apartment building, and the language center/church is on the first floor, so all we have to do to go to class is walk downstairs.  Anna does school with the girls, and we usually have a break at about 10:30 so we’ll come check on the girls and get some water, and go back to class until 1:00 pm.  We have a language helper, and a language coach who’s sort of in charge of the class.  There are five of us in the class, us, a couple from South Africa, and another guy  from Canada.  We have had a couple weeks of just listening, pointing and comprehension with over 400 words rolling around in our heads.  Tomorrow, we get to start speaking some of those words for the first time… yaaaay!  We’re pretty excited, feels like a milestone in our french learning.  Here the main meal is in the middle of the day, so I’ve been trying to do that.  I get home from class and make food, if our maid is at our house then she eats with us, then the girls go to bed and I listen to my french recordings/rest.  We eat a small dinner, and then it seems like what takes forever to get the girls ready for bed.  Coral them, give them malarone, bathe their sticky bodies, brush their teeth, get pajama’s (underwear) on, read a bible story, pray, and tuck their mosquito nets in, even though the goal was 8:30 by this time it’s usually in between 9 and 10.  And at this point, we still have to clean up the house, bathe, brush our teeth, and then listen to french recordings… on language days there really isn’t much time in the day for many extra activities because all the normal day actives seem to take a lot of time.  So we usually see Del and Arielle family on the weekends because there isn’t time any other days, unless we really squeeze it in, and then something else suffers, that’s just how it is.

TJ got to go fishing with a friend

Friday we went on a double date down town to get stuff and then had some amazing coffee  🙂

Yesterday Del and Arielle family and all of us went on an adventure.  We rented the mission van and drove the long way out to “lac Rose”  there were lots of dirt roads, and we probably asked about 20 people if we were going the right way…. surprisingly enough most of the time we were.   Penny threw up when we got there because she was car sick, so we went looking around for a dress for her, we only found one that was her size!  The  guy wanted like $20 for it… well heck no!  So we bartered down to $4… yay us, and yay for Penny having clothes to wear!

they said the felt like pieces of drift wood

floating

When we got there we went down to the lake..  and because it’s rainy season it wan’t very pink, I guess in the dry season it has a much stronger pink hugh.  It is FULL of salt and so those of us that went in would just float in the lake, like really float… it was a little crazy!  When we got out of the water, there was a guy that would rinse us off with his bucket and water from the stream and then we could either pay him a little or barter for something from his collection of things… tricky!!  After we had some snacks and walked around, we found a place to rest and eat some Senegalese food.

Eating Together

Next we drove up the road to check out the camel rides.  I had envisioned it being really straightforward with compliant camels letting us ride them.  As they were getting the camels ready a couple of them kept running away (no fences) and the guy would have to go run after them and put them in their place, and get them to sit back down.  There were 6 camels and there were 6 adults with 5 kids, so we all decided TJ could take the CRAZY stubborn loud camel because we didn’t want to be near him… LOL!!

TJ off on his own with his loud crazy camel!

So we all started getting on the camels  one by one, we were all feeling a little nervous to say the least.  After Penny and I got on the camel, I just started laughing and couldn’t stop because I felt so nervous, my nervousness of course made Penny nervous too.

my camel buddy

Anna had Ava, she was a little nervous too.

camel buddies

Each camel was tied to the camel in front of them except for TJ’s camel, this kid was leading TJ’s camel near us, but not near enough to make our camels upset.  The whole time TJ’s camel was moaning and groaning… literally didn’t stop for the entire 20 minutes we were on the ride… I could NOT stop laughing!!  It was quite the experience and I’m so glad we got to do it with family, we will be laughing about that for years!!

here we are… all but TJ

We’ve been here for over a month, we’ve gotten used to some things and have been struggling with other things more.  I have decided that I need to figure out how to go to market and barter for veggies, because I want more fresh vegetables… I long for that now that we’ve been eating so much bread… bread bread bread, I’m gonna get fat!  So… to market I go, if any of you ever come visit me, your gonna see what I’m talking about.  Yaaaa. 🙂

Sooo… little update, I went to market today.  Del and Arielle met Ava and I there, and we bought fresh veggies… I’m so excited to have fresh stuff 🙂  It is just not like going to the grocery store where you can buy whatever you want for a fixed price.  Everything must be a bartered for, BUT… I am feeling more confident and I think I will go alone soon…. I am making progress, that is what I must remember… I am making progress.

This is what I look like when I get back from Market… no filter….Very sweaty and Hot!

It’s hard to tell… but my clothes are pretty much soaked. Senegal Life 🙂  We LIVE here!! Craziness.

Chill’n on Del and Arielle’s roof

Today marks the 3rd Sunday we have been away from our church, Trinity Community Church… you know who you are and we miss you!

We are all in the same class at the MTC, and are now in West together

Our Welcome Party/ e2 meeting

Yesterday we went (got our own transportation, and rode a bus) to “The Mission” where all the missionaries came to have a welcome party for us, we had a Senegalese meal, we shared a little about ourselves and they prayed for us.  We also got the chance to meet some people we hadn’t met yet.  A friend who I hadn’t seen in a while, said to me “I’m so sorry for your loss”  and all of the sudden I remember wow, I just lost a baby… it feels like that was months ago and like we’re in a completely different world!!  It’s just a reminder that things take time and processing doesn’t happen all at once, God will continue to be faithful, I know there will be times of sadness and disappointment in the baby area of my life, but right now I feel numb to that pain.

Riding in a car rapid (rapeed)

I was challenged by our nanny Anna, she decided to write down all the things that she is thankful for, she defiantly included the thinks that are different or she doesn’t like, but she chose to write down what she as grateful for, so I want to do the same.

We have been here for just a week and a half… why does it feel like a whole month?!  So much… so much to take in, so much to experience.  I wish I could just take you here with me for a day, so that you might experience this with me.  There are moments (or hours) where I miss my friends, I miss going to Cracker Barrel with Krista and joking around while we walk around Marshalls, I miss sitting with Cherie and talking about life, I miss taking the kids to Grandma’s and watching them love on all their aunt’s cousins, Grandma and Grandpa.  I miss seeing Ava excited to hang out with her church friends.  I miss those relationships most.  Out of life in America I miss the relationships, I miss the Dewitt’s and the way they feel like family, I miss our small group, I miss our church friends, conversations with Callie about life, hugs from Ashley and squeezing Lyla’s cheeks,  Jelly and her sass, Nieves and her big heart, Sara Schroll’s smile, sweet Audrey, Kricket and her mom’s amazing advice, Hilda’s sweet hugs for my girls, Patty’s encouragement, the worship team’s leading in worship, Kim’s sweet words and hugs… I know I’m missing people in this, I just want our church to know we love you and your relationship with us is important and we miss you!!  This is the hardest part about having an incredible support base is that it really sucks to leave, I felt the same way when we left California.  Oh what sweet days those will be in Heaven when we will all be together, I wonder what that will look like?

I attempted to make eclairs with pistachio pudding, the eclairs didn’t rise and the pudding didn’t act like I wanted, but they were still tasty

So things I’m thankful for:  My brother Del, sister in law Arielle and their 3 boys live in Senegal too.  We came to a completely new country and place, and we have family, seriously how rare is that?  We have been spending days and days together.  (And it still doesn’t feel like enough).  Today we invited them over for lunch after church and we spend several hours together cooking and sweating in the kitchen, eating, talking, cleaning, kids playing, more cleaning… it is wonderful…. I love it!!  It is so special that they are here, and it is special for them that we are here.  They have lived here for a couple years and we are walking into their world, and at the same time it is becoming our world too.  I love that they were the ones to show us some different things for the first time, like driving and walking down the streets for the first time, going to Market, boutique, grocery store, so on and so forth we will always have that!  I love that in the middle of life being hard and different we can come together and just be together, we can pray together… IN AFRICA!!  These moments feel like dreams come true.  This is probably the biggest thing we are thankful for right now!

Arielle and I cooking together in the kitchen 🙂

I am thankful that I’m learning who to cook here.  I am thankful my kids sleep even through the heat and mosquito nets, I am thankful their heat rash is going away.  I am thankful for filtered water, for bleach and soap.  I am so so thankful for some of the kitchen items I brought in our container to make my kitchen feel more like home.  I am thankful for my patient husband who is willing to do anything for me, who is willing to go out on the street and make a complete fool of himself looking for the items that we need, I’m thankful for his adventurous heart and willingness to try and do new things.  I am thankful for a nanny and school teacher for my girls.  I am thankful fans, and running water (most of the time), and the ability to take a cold shower every night.  I am thankful for Doo-doo and Sophie, on the corner of our street who talk to us every time we walk by, even though we don’t speak a lick of french yet.  I’m thankful for the guy across the street who sells us fruit and is gracious with our lack of french, not everyone is so gracious.

bath time

I’m thankful to the Lord for keeping us safe, and sustaining us, I am thankful that we feel more at home in our apartment.  I am thankful to be starting french this Wednesday.  I am thankful that we are here and that we are experiencing this.  Life has been hard, and I was ready for a different kind of hard.  We have been looking forward to this time for a long time and honestly I really do relish the fact that we’re here and it’s finally happening.  As we have parted with good friendships in Florida we look forward to the friendships that await us here and what that looks like.  I am excited to come back to the states and talk about my friends here, I know that it will look different and will be different, but that is what excites me most about being here, the relationships… which is probably why I’m so excited to learn french so that I might be able to develop those.

Please pray for Anna as she starts teaching Kindergarten tomorrow and has the girls to herself, this is a big job.  Pray that she would feel at home and comfortable with our family, she is going through double culture shock, Africa, AND our family.

Eating our first Senagalese meal with our maid

I have these random moments where I just burst into tears and there is not really a particular reason why I’m crying…

TJ asked me this evening why I was grumpy… why was I responding to him badly?  I looked at him and said “I don’t know”  and through the 5 minute hug I just cried.  I’m sure it had something to do with the fact that there was no water coming out of the faucet, I was hot and had been dripping sweat all day, the water taste weird, my daughters have heat rash and miss their friends, I can’t communicate with the house help when I so desperately want to!

It’s so funny, there has been so much lead up to us coming here… Our “people” from all over the country rooting us on and sending us, excited with us, maybe even putting us up on a bit of a pedestal.  We get here, we move into our apartment, and go try to buy some bleach from the local Boutique, we know the french word but they can’t even understand us!  People look at us funny as we walk down the street… what’s the moral of this short story?  They don’t really give a rip that we’re here!  You get my point?

We have been taught this concept for years about how humbling it is to move into a new culture, and how it is much like an incarnation experience… well we are now experiencing it for the first time.  It’s a good thing we’re not moving here because people like us so much.  God is the one who brought us here, and he does not NEED us to do ANYTHING… we get the privilege of being a part of what he’s doing… how exciting, we can just walk this road (not necessarily easy) and follow him, knowing that he is going to direct us, and he’s gonna be clear.  I’m so glad I know our heavenly father.

So I’m trying to get used to the idea of house help… it’s still a little weird.  She washes our clothes!!  The other day she used so much soap, our clothes were all stiff on the line, and apparently it takes 2 days to dry which is unfortunate because it rains pretty much every night and then they can get wet if the wind is blowing through the screen onto our hanging clothes.

Today is Wednesday and on Wednesdays she makes a meal for us.  So today we gave her about $10 (5,000 Franks)  to go to Market to buy the ingredients she needed, she came back and began cooking, which took a couple hours.  This was our fist Senegalese meal here, it traditionally goes into a big bowl platter thing, the rice first and then this yummy onion goodness sauce, and then the whole chicken is sort of thrown on top.  There was also cucumbers, tomatoes, green olives and egg halves spread over it.   She put it on our coffee table and brought spoons to all of us.  TJ, Anna, Ava, Penny and I are all sitting at the table, I invite her to sit with us, and I try to communicate with her that we want her to show us what to do… she didn’t really want to, so I just started trying to take a part the chicken off the bone.  It’s not okay to touch the food with your left hand, so I was struggling to do anything, and I was so paranoid that I was going to do something wrong.  Anyway, we all ate out of the same bowl… Penny and Ava LOVED it!  They were more excited about this meal than any other meal!  I feel like they ate as much as the adults… proud of my little African girls :).

We have been having a lot of orientations this week.  Medical orientation, security orientation, E2 orientation, language orientation.  It has all been so helpful!!  We are getting a really good big picture of what these next couple years will look like and what the goals are in building relationships and language learning.  I feel like they are doing a really good job at facilitating us jumping into language and culture here, and how we will go about doing that without holding our hands like big babies.  If you know me, you know I love a plan, so this is all very helpful for me 🙂   We start French Study classes next Wednesday, and we are pretty stocked about it!  🙂

Also I made my first real meal in my kitchen yesterday, it didn’t have meat in it, well because I’m still getting there, but we had tomato cream sauce with noodles, mango juice glazed carrots and salad.  Everything takes a little longer, because you fill up the pot with the filtered water to boil for the noodles, you soak the carrots in bleach, then peel them, then cook them, you have to soak the lettuce in bleach water as well… thankfully I already had the ranch made (fortunately I have found an amazing ranch recipe from the missionary ladies here!)  It’s not bad, the reality is just that everything takes a little more time.  If you know me you know I am a bit of a health nut.  While we can find healthy options here, the fact also stands that we didn’t come here to be healthy and it’s not really the same as it was in the states.  But did we come here to be health freaks?  Or did we come here to follow God and be a part of reaching the lost with the gospel?  Gospel #1  Health #2 (because it’s still a priority for me ;).  Sacrifices must be made.  I will eat bleached salad (because I want salad), and live a different life because our God has called us to it.

Please be praying for us, that our bodies would be healthy, that we would not be short with one another, that we would make time for time in the word, that we would have wisdom and patience with our girls as they are going through such a transition!

Eating our Senegalese Lunch

The Ruth’s housed us in Maryland for a week… what a blessing they were!

We got to spend an evening with the Lehardy’s in Maryland from Mariner’s church

Friends we got to see while in Maryland

{Day 1) – September 2nd, 2015

God was 100% clear when he asked me to serve in full time missions 10 years ago.  What a journey it has been, and yet it has just begun.  We have been talking about leaving for years and years and years.  We have been planning and preparing, we’ve been answering questions that we don’t REALLY know the answers to, we’ve been anticipating what it’s gonna be like for years and years.  So the lead up to actually moving our family to Senegal, West Africa has been indescribable.

These past few days before we actually departed for Senegal I have started really freaking out, nervous about doing life here… wondering if there is something I can do to prepare myself more for what we’re about to jump into.  Well there is nothing more I could do, I have done everything a person could do to prepare moving overseas for 10 years now.

checking in… thankfully it went smoothly!

waiting for our flight

on the plane

Well today was the day.  We have done SOooo much talking about it, now it’s time to just do it!  We had an overnight flight.  The girls slept okay on the plane but not great, I slept a little bit, but not much, TJ slept more than me.  As we flew over the ocean, morning came faster as we flew towards the Africa morning.  The sun began shining in the airplane window, and my excitement began to feel unbearable… I was giddy to say the least.  As we drew nearer we began to see land, TJ and I looked at each other and said with huge smiles on our faces “This is it, we’re doing it!”  As we got lower we began to see the tops of all the buildings which look so different than anywhere I’ve ever been, it looked dusty and almost like none of the buildings were done being built, but that’s just how they look, anyway I began to cry realizing that this was going to be our home, and it would be a while before we left this place again.

We landed, went through customs and as we walked outside, Del, Arielle and family were waiting for us, as well as Anna and Annalise.  We walked down a gated path, with lots of Africans around trying to get us to buy stuff or get a taxi from them, but we just walked straight to the mission van.  TJ was about to pay the guy who helped us, but Del and Ari, said “No TJ we’ll take care of it!”  {Cultural things we do not understand yet :)} We loaded up all our stuff and ourselves into the van, all the cousins so happy to be together again!  Del began driving, there were lots of African people everywhere, not a white person in site… you know how we Americans (in America) like to make all the streets and houses nice and neat?  No… just no, it’s not that, there is trash and dust and sewer bubbling up out of the not-very-well-made sewer system.  There is little fruit stands, and Nes-Cafe stands… many, many people selling all kinds of stuff outside, or in their little shops (of which you walk about 3 feet in and that’s the shop).  There was little to no traffic lights, and it feels like there are no traffic rules, everyone just sort of butts in and it feels as though everyone should be running in to each other, but they don’t (I’m sure sometimes they do).  At one point, Del had to pull his side mirror in with his hand because the guy next to us was THAT CLOSE!!!  Everything looked the same, and I wondered how I might be able to walk down the street and know where I’m going… I wondering how I MIGHT BE ABLE TO WALK DOWN THE STREET??!!! I felt overwhelmed and wasn’t sure how I was supposed to take all of this in.  I had a hard time understanding that we are actually going to LIVE HERE!!  This place is so foreign to me, and I don’t know how to do anything, I don’t know how to wash dishes, or wash the fruit, I had to figure out how to flush the toilet… I’m not sure exactly how to even bathe yet!  I don’t know where or how to buy food, nor have I memorized the exchange rate of franks to dollars.  We have to learn how to filter water, and light the stove every time we want to use it.  I asked Arielle how we are going to wash clothes, she said:  “She has two hands”  me “oh… okay”.  Everything seems and feels unknown and scary.

First moment seeing my brother

first moments of walking out of the airport

Our first trip driving through the city streets

everyone together and happy!!

The good thing about all of this is that we have LOTS of help, we have people scheduling our next couple weeks, and planning how to help us learn all these things that feel like big mountains right now to ease us into life here. Our apartment feels like a blessing and already feels like a place that is ours, and a place that we will be able to rest from the hustle and bustle of life. (even though there is lots of street noises coming in our windows such as, honking, kids crying, sirens, sheep baaing)

Del and Arielle have done lots to get ready for us, having the apartment cleaned, buying and bringing food for us to have ready here.  Del got up early and made Cinnamon Rolls for us to have when we got to our apartment.  He made yummy eggs, and had fruit as well.  We had somewhat of a feast for lunch… we feel so welcomed by them and others.

I got to see my friend Cathren who also lives here!!

I look forward to looking back on these beginning days because I can sense that they will be hard with everything we need to figure out, and with all that the girls are going through, but I am also intending on enjoying the experience of all that God has for us right now.  He has been preparing us, and he asked us to come here, so I am anticipating what else he’s got for us, and what he’s going to do just in these days that we’re in now.

{Day 3}

The nights seem a little difficult to sleep with all the noise, but I do feel like I am finally getting some rest.  Our alarm this morning was a trash truck honking loudly outside on our street, I quickly remembered that Del said when we hear the honking, we take the trash out there as fast as we can, because sometimes they go on strike and don’t come for a week, so you ALWAYS take it out.   In my stupor I said “TJ… TJ the trash!!  We have to take the trash out!”  so he got dressed, I got the trash ready and he ran outside…. yaaay, we accomplished taking the trash out! 🙂

I am feeling a little more excited to be here today.  This morning our cleaning lady came, we’ll call her “M”.  And in case you don’t know, giving someone a job to clean here is helping them provide for their family, it would be selfish of us not to give someone a job.  And it is really nice to have the help.  Because it is so dusty here, everything gets dirty fast, and so the floors get swept and mopped several times a week.  I officially want to learn french… I hate not knowing the language, so I’m excited to begin that.

This morning Arielle took me to market, we walked down the street, and to the left down the first dirt road, and when we actually walked into “Market”  people were shoulder to shoulder (or butt to butt) pushing their way through.  It was definitely like a dream come true walking down the streets with my sister in law Arielle… pretty cool moment for sure!   There was lots of different kinds of vegetables and fruit being sold on mats on the street, people just putting their stuff down and selling it.  The smell of fish was everywhere and other smells I can’t quite describe but were not pleasant.  We bought a couple bins and some sweet potatoes and lettuce of which Arielle had to barter for.  As we were waiting for our change back from the lettuce lady a semi truck began driving through, you might be asking through where?  My thoughts exactly!  The truck was gonna drive through the market, he was honking his big horn and so everyone just started picking up their mats and moving their stuff and the truck would just drive through… there were moments when we were inches away from the truck as it was driving next to us.  Arielle said that trucks will do that through the market, but she had never seen one that big!  Because we were carrying bins (or anything I guess) there were these boys who kept asking if they could carry our stuff and try to grab it out of our hands… pretty much the entire time this was happening, it was sort of annoying in my opinion.  Wow… what an interesting first day at market.  Thank you Arielle!!

After we got back from market, I cooked for the first time in my kitchen, it was a simple meal, but I cooked it which also feels like an accomplishment.

{Day 5) September 6th

Yesterday we went to two grocery stores, One of them was closer and somewhere I can walk to often, I felt encouraged as we walked through the store… I thought to myself “We ARE going to make it, we will survive after all… we will eat food!!  There are shelves with food on them and prices marked… yaaay!  I actually started doing the math in my head from Franks to dollars…. yaaaaay me!  I do want to conquer the street market, however this was very nice too!  It was a big day, and very good learning experience as far as what we have access too.  We also went to [how you say it:]  Heeber Marsh-ay,  I was grateful to find different asian options for food, as well as what things cost and what is available.  We normally eat lots of cheese, which is very expensive here, we will probably eat it still, just not as much.  Chicken is sort of hard to get, so we will probably do beef, fish and other forms of protein.  There is a bakery across our street and a little boutique not far from our apartment, where we can buy eggs, onions garlic, bottled water, baguettes… things like that.

I don’t have too many pictures yet, because I haven’t felt too comfortable taking them yet, and as far as our apartment, I’m gonna wait till it looks better and not so messy. 🙂

Today we went to Del and Arielle’s church, normally they have Sunday school for kids, but not today, and the girls had a really hard time sitting in church for that long, so it was sort of draining for them and in turn for us.  It was fun to hear everyone worshiping the Lord in french and in their such deep african voices, I loved it, and can’t wait to praise God with them in French!!  We missed our church today, but at the same time because we have such amazing supporting churches behind us, it felt easier to be here… does that make sense?

Please be praying for us as this sort of transition is not easy on our girls or us.  We had  paper chain before we left Florida, the girls cutting one off every day until we left for Africa… Well Ava just asked us if we could make a paper chain for the days until we leave Africa.  My poor baby heart, our girls need prayer too as this is not easy, and they have been pulled away from there many church friends and family, of which they talk a lot about.  This is one reason we are so grateful to be near family here, oh what a blessing this has been!!  Our relationships are all more difficult with each other, and the weight of everything here is overwhelming.